Womankind has been creating to-do lists since the dawn of time.
Everyone knows that.
And most of us…as much as we love crossing things off our list…we truly do have a dysfunctional, resentful, love-to-hate-ya relationship with our to-do lists, at best. Now what I’m proposing here is that we rehabilitate our concepts of how shit gets done. We make life too damn painful because we believe that work sucks and getting things done should be miserable, boring and burdensome.
The ta-da list is a shift in mindset that will make tasks magically painless or even pleasurable! And your list items will seem to have their own disappearing act.
Here are my top 3 tips:
Set an intention for your ta-da list: write down in the number one position how you want to feel when you approach this list. The rabbit in the hat - associate the tasks with positivity and inspiration to avoid the pitfall of the mind attaching intolerable levels of pain with your tasks.
For example:
I intend to bring joy to the moments I spend completing these items.
I intend to connect to my own unique genius and gifts as I complete these items.
I intend to have gratitude for what these tasks will ultimately create in my life and thank them, one-by-one, for being in my life.
I intend to bring a sense of curiosity and enthusiasm as I remember that life is a mystical wonder and I never know what will happen next as I move toward these items.
I intend to connect to the fact that I CAN do all of these things with my own mind and body, and have gratitude for being capable and able-bodied.
Snail speed: play with how slowly you can begin a task. Sometimes it is the frantic pace that has become the pain point for completing the task. Play some super zenned-out music, grab a cup of tea, and tell yourself, “I have aaaaaall the time in the world for this one.” Magically, if you take the time crunch out of the equation, the task gets done.
Spread the love: Consider writing your ta-da list items on your calendar instead of actually making a list format. This one is from my sister, the calendar master. This way, you spread your items out along the week or month, whatever feels good and manageable. You see the list in bite-sized pieces and this helps you avoid the overwhelming feeling of having to do everything in one day.
The following Wisdom Bombs are from Martha Beck
Turtle Steps: just like the lovely assistant being sawed inside the magician’s box, take one of your ta-da list items and cut ‘er in half. So, say you need to send back a pair of shoes that didn’t fit. Cutting this in half could look like, say, locating the drop off location on the map. Ok, so you’ve cut it in half, you know where you need to take your package…and here’s where it gets even more interesting - you cut it in half AGAIN (woman screaming). How exciting! So, now your list item could be: Put the shoes back in the box. Voila!
The whole point of a turtle step is to make it so ridiculously easy that it would be a joke to NOT do it. This task is so small and so easy that it feels like it magically completes itself. Link together these microscopic tasks and all of the sudden big things are done - abracadabra! The cool part is that all along the brain is getting rewarded and you’re building your positively enviable relationship to finishing things.
The 3 B’s: Bag it, Barter it, Better it. Again, this is to make the task more palatable. The more “eau de painful” stink you can remove from the experience, the more likely you will finish it quickly. Here’s what that might look like:
Bag it: Ask yourself if the task really must get done. There is magic in realizing that, in fact, a task is not essential. Did you unconsciously tell yourself you had to do something that you truly do not need to do?
Barter it: Can you get someone else to do it? Trade, pay, teach them a skill, drive them to the airport, offer to bake them a pie…what would it take to not have to do this task yourself?
Better it: Get creative about ways the task could be more enjoyable: listening to music, inviting a friend for support, brainstorming with someone ahead of time, using crayons, spraying the room with your favorite essential oil, burning sage to clear negative energy around the task, doing a happy dance before you begin to introduce some endorphins…you get the picture. A fellow coach of mine described how she hated folding laundry so much she had to create a game with herself where she would throw on some fun, upbeat music and try to get as much laundry folded as she could before one song ended. I tried it, it is actually a blast!
The overarching Ta-Don’ts:
Don’t make it painful. If you attach mental anguish to your task, drag your feet, or procrastinate, you will ultimately make the task way more punishing that it ever was originally. This goes for all aspects of life. If you do this, just know that YOU are the one creating your own misery…and it is optional.
Don’t strive for perfection. As many people are chanting now, “Done is better than good.” If you are a self-proclaimed perfectionist, you have deeper emotional pain to address than what you’ll see on your latest to-do list. Just know that being self-critical and having competitively high standards is going to get you nowhere fast. Or, more accurately, take you on a fast-track to your own personal hell. Not only that, but the negativity of your own inner dialog will deplete your energy stores, making your tasks feel heavy and challenging…even when it is just putting some shoes in a box. Get the task “done” first and foremost; this will skyrocket your energy stores - and if you want to take a second pass at it later to get it to be “good” then have at it! You have all the time in the world to lower your own pressure and practice kindness toward yourself.