Now, the first time someone introduced this idea of mind-body pain, I absolutely dismissed the possibility. Actually, I was downright offended at the suggestion. No way! My pain was clearly in my knees, without a doubt, and it had been since childhood. There was no way it could be coming from anywhere else. The span I had to travel mentally to grasp that was too far at the time, I just couldn’t make the leap. The degree to which our minds are conditioned to filter, reject, and harshly oppose new ideas is impressive. All stemming from our past experiences. I was totally subscribed to Physical Therapy at that time, working as a PT assistant. The problem was physical, damnit! Or was it?
Psychosomatic. That word is easy to misunderstand. The pain is not “all in your head,” the pain is not imaginary, it is absolutely real. Parts of your body are experiencing real pain, tightness, and even redness or swelling may be present. But it isn’t “all in your body” either if you’re anything like me and the other thousands of people who suffer from psychosomatic pain disorders.
Here are the signs that you may suffer from mind-body, or psychosomatic, syndrome:
You strive to be a really good person, very well-liked by all, a people pleaser, you put others first
You’re really hard on yourself or a perfectionist
You are discontent for most of your day, wishing for things to be different than they actually are
Your pain is from an injury but the pain has exceeded the expected healing time
Your pain is on your mind almost every minute of the day, in fact it’s now your full-time job to think about it, worry about it, and try to get it to subside
You experience a lot of emotion, or very little emotion, either end of the spectrum
You experience things more deeply than others (people say you are sensitive)
You have difficulty expressing your true self around family, friends, or in social settings (people say you are an introvert)
Your pain is accompanied by many deep fears and worries
Your pain moves or spreads to large parts of your body
Does this sound like you?
For me, the sensation was like my knees were shrink wrapped very tightly and ached like broken bones on the inside. I had a lot of muscle tension, knots, trigger points, soreness, and swelling. I had pain with bending and straightening my knees.
The way it works is this: it’s no longer a theory, it’s a scientific fact that the mind can generate painful responses in the body and all sorts of other placebo affects to a huge variety of stimulus. The mind controls blood circulation and can shut off blood flow to areas of the body, creating ischemia, which can be extremely painful in tissues of the body. Symptoms can present as muscle pain and tightness, shooting nerve pain, muscular dysfunction and atrophy, gastrointestinal dysfunction, etc.
The amount of emotional suffering I endured before opening my mind to non-physical modalities was tremendous and lasted over 20 years. I almost can’t believe that number now that I’m looking back. I lost my ability to do the things I loved, felt isolated from friends, and missed doing trips that involved physical activity. At that time, I felt my pain was ruining my entire life. And I’m not a quitter. I tried every possible therapy and woo-woo specialist I could find, dumping thousands of dollars down the drain and ending up in exactly the same painful situation each time. I even resorted to surgery on both knees only to have the pain return after a few months.
Years later, I had a massage therapist tell me about Dr. Sarno as we were discussing my husband’s ailments- a broken wrist that was extremely painful even after it finally healed. I read Dr. Sarno’s books on behalf of my husband to try to help and within a few pages I saw myself staring back from the pages. The list above - my hand goes up for every single bullet item. I started implementing the techniques in his books and watching videos of people who found healing through those techniques as well. But I needed something to really prove it to me, I was a tough sell and I wasn’t going to buy into this like some schmuck. I needed to know for sure that I had psychosomatic pain.
A friend texted a few days after I’d been using the mind-body techniques and asked if I wanted to do this crazy mountain bike ride called “All of Skeggs.” It was riding every lick of trail in the Skeggs Park in California and although I’d been riding now for over 15 years, this would be my longest, hardest mountain bike ride ever. I immediately said no. I had just returned from a trip and the flight made my knees and muscles so sore I couldn’t ride. But then I thought, hey, this would be the perfect way to see if this mind-body stuff is legit. I texted her back and said I was in.
The next morning I came mentally prepared, knowing that if things really did get bad I could bail at numerous bail outs during the day. But I was feeling committed to working at the mind-body techniques and just looked at it like a day-long practice. We began to ride and I felt pretty good. Then it started. My knees began screaming at me, asking me to stop pedaling.
I calmly followed the technique described in Dr. Sarno’s book, The Mindbody Prescription, although this version below has my own personal modifications that I find to be even more helpful than the original version.
Practical Redirection Practice
When the pain arises, acknowledge where it is located in the body.
Then immediately say to yourself, “I know the pain is real but I also know it is caused by lack of blood flow, which is controlled by the mind under stress or other emotional suffering (Dr. Sarno says repressed rage is to blame, but I have since expanded my definition).
Then get curious, “How am I feeling right now?” Take a few seconds to consider exactly what you might be reacting to in that moment. Ask, “what am I really experiencing emotionally?” Am I bored, frightened, worried, sad, annoyed, anxious, angry?
Take a few moments to allow the experience of any emotion that arises. In this way, you divert your attention away from the physical pain and direct it where it belongs, on the emotional pain. You may even wish to say, “now is a safe time for me to feel this way.”
Repeat this as often as the pain arises. Most emotions only last up to 90 seconds if you completely allow them without any sort of resistance, so allowing the emotion to arise does not necessarily mean you’re trashing the next four hours. Although, if you’re super pent up, it is possible.
I had to practice this about 100 times during the course of that ride. It was a long day but by the end of it we had climbed over 11,000 feet in 43 miles. The two others who finished the ride were tuckered. Meanwhile, I was jumping up and down, squatting super low, and just basically in a complete state of joy and disbelief because I felt amazing! Zero pain at the end, zero pain the next day.
It was like a freaking miracle!
After that day, I started really challenging myself physically. Now that I had no limitations, what the heck did I feel like doing? I biked up a trail to the top of Pikes Peak, a 14,000 ft mountain, something I had wanted to do for years but was too afraid. I began entering local races at the pro level. I started lifting more than double my bodyweight in the gym. I even started running again. Not bad for a gal who was told by doctors that I should only swim or walk because I had the “live with it” disease. It felt amazing to prove them all wrong.
By now, working with my own psychosomatic problems plus helping clients become symptom-free for the most part, I have collected dozens of techniques. There are so many ways to address pain besides popping a pain killer or going to a chiropractor. Not that there aren’t times where those treatments are beneficial. I’m not opposed to physical treatments, but I do know if the mind is constantly under pressure, if you are actively suppressing or repressing emotions, and even if you notice you are in the habit of “resisting the now” as Eckhart Tolle puts it. Monitor your thinking. If you notice you are continually wishing for things to be different, there is a continuous strain on your mind. Even if it’s just for the work day to end, or for people to be quieter, or for your commute to have one less red light, or for your hair to be looking this or that way. Notice these moments and try to allow what is.
As Byron Katie says, “All of the stress we feel is caused by arguing with what is. These thoughts are ways of wanting reality to be different than it is. The only time we suffer is when we believe a thought that argues with what is. When I argue with reality, I lose every time.”
Eckhart Tolle advises us to “resist nothing.” There is great peace in the now and finding a life of ease is beautiful, although sadly it is countercultural.
If you’d like to know more, book a free mini-session with me on my “Work with Me” page. I’d love to share what I’ve learned with you!